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Run: 1154

Venue: Watlington Hill, Christmas Common

Hares: Foghorn, Ladybird & Chuck
Joint run with Oxford H3 & Didcot H3

Lemming, Mother Teresa, Spot, Cuddles, Greenfly, Cloggs (gone for a pee in the bushes), Clogg's friend, Wally, C5, Whinge, Shep, Chopstixs, Spex, Richard, Paella, Le Voision, Michaela, TT1, 2 & 3, Two Bob boy & dog, C-lingus, Pyro, Drexel, Hamlet, Daz, Septic, Mr M (arriving VERY late), BGB, Sticky Dicky.
Many more from Oxford, Didcot and I'm sure a few Bicester as well (probably masquerading as Oxford).

Virgin scribes second attempt.

My second attempt at the noble art of Gob Sheet writing, however as I forgot to distribute last weeks it feels like the first time again. It gives you lot twice as much to read today.
The hares arrived last night and proceeded to check the pub out until midnight, when they retired to Foghorns camper, this explains why both the Brakspears and the Robinsons bitter ran out.

The Run:
A huge turnout fills the car park to overflowing, disturbing the few walkers who happen to be there. Cloggs and Lemming set the tone with some puddle jumping, Cloggs nice pink T-shirt acquiring a garish brown stain. Wally has finally dressed up for Christmas, only a week too late and looking far more Common than Christmas. My millennium starts off the right way with Paella dropping her keys in my posing pouch (bum bag to the rest of you), with a promise to retrieve them later (not until after I have a copy made).
Eventually we all head off up the road back towards the village, check at the cross-roads and finally off-road where Ladybird is standing next to a very large erection (mobile 'phone mast).

In the woods, hashers melee around like escapees from Joseph & the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (except with less trail finding ability). We scamper up and down hills, over brambles and through great puddles of shiggy. Cloggs at this point confesses to not having checked at all, she seems to have spent most of the time frolicking in the mud. It transpires that a short cut has been rubbed out by some vindictive game warden - tough we will just have to run further and scare the sh*t out of more pheasants.

There is very little coherent speech on the tape at this point, just muffled panting, either due to the very long hill that we just had to run up, or to TT3 promising to "get the whip out" to get us lazy boys going (honestly I don't need it). BGB is spotted checking, but not calling (nothing new then), however the Berks black & white rugby shirt does not form good camouflage and he is called to order with Greenfly dispatched after him - sadly it was a false trail.

Poor Lemming (poor Lemming? - what am I on!) now has his pants forcibly messed, I think he quite enjoys the feeling of mud down there, but those flints scratch a bit. I manage to persuade him and Cloggs to avoid dowsing me "because it will wet the dictaphone", I have spent years trying to get my dictaphone wet - and now I am turning down the offer. Lemming tries to wipe off most of the mud on Michaela, but she escapes with some minor splatters.

Back onto the Christmas Common road where the long and short trails split, the long trail promising more woods, mud and hills. At this point I am told a story about Wally attempting to recreate the "river of fire" in his back garden, using some old guttering and a gallon of petrol. He now has slightly less hair, singed eyebrows and a strange stare caused by temporary damage to the retinas. Christine and the kids were rescued by some very nice firemen and have got him some of those little cotton mittens that are tied onto baby's hands to stop them scratching (alright, so I exaggerate a little).

The promised woods, mud and hills materialise, then suddenly we are out in sunlight with a magnificent view across the Thames valley to Didcot and up to Oxford. To further improve matters; Foghorn points out across the valley, Greenfly and a couple of others struggling up a very long false trail. We fly down the hill, along a track and then begin the long haul up Waltington Hill, back to the car park.
I must say it was an excellent run, very successfully clearing out the remnants of Christmas 'flu and Millennium party hangovers.

Down-downs:
Officiated in the car park by C5, Geoff, & 'Whadesay.

Paella, for knocking down Geoff, GM of Didcot, her fetching red jumper showing just how cold the beer is.

Nick & Susan from Didcot for driving down from Derby this morning, just for the Hash. Very impressive quaffing.

Two Bob & Heide (his 3 legged dog), Two Bob has to drink from the dog bowl, while Heide is given the potty. However she prefers the puddles to lap up, just show what crap the beer is.

Ringer, for being first home from Didcot (only a couple of miles behind Greenfly then). He started drinking well, but then needed a pause to let the Boddingtons fizz go down.

0898 from Oxford for some obscure reason.

Spot, for going to the Surrey Millennium Picnic, drinking far too much Vodka and leaving all his stuff there. He gets beer, some left over Ouzo, ½ a mince pie, lettuce and a beetroot. Steadily drank it down filtering the bits out with his teeth.

Daglocks as GM of Bicester for turning up with no kit and
Mr Mainwaring for turning up extremely late and missing the run.
They both downed excellently for a draw.

Finally the hares, Chuck finishing first, closely followed by Ladybird with Foghorn emptying his glass finally over C5.

Off to the pub!
The pub was very crowded, but we were made most welcome by the Landlord, drinking him out of two of his draught bitters. Some stayed until long past 4pm partaking of a singsong with the locals during which Lemming dropped his pants - it was not apparent what Mother sees in him.

Forthcoming runs:

Number

date

OS ref

Venue

Hares

1156		16/01/2000	698808		Bishopswood		Lord Lucan
						Braille trail		& Shep

1157		23/01/2000	833765		The Star		Lynda, Amanda
						Waltham St. Lawrence	Clare & Jacqui

1158		30/01/2000	813636		Finchampstead Ridges	Chuck
Chucks Farewell run, joint with North Hants H3	car park		& Foghorn

Onto The Queens Oak OS ref 793640